Friday, April 29, 2005

my brain does exist, fancy that

Lately I have felt all mushy in the head, like things weren't really connecting or maybe I just haven't been wanting to think anymore because it gets overwhelming sometimes. Sad that I can get overwhelmed using only 10% (if that) of my brain, imagine if I was using 12%, just that little increase would really screw me up. This month our church has had a Theologian in Residence, James Alison. While he's been here he has preached, had a retreat, and also taught a four session class. I went to the final class last night with Olivia, who has been to all of them, and I regret not signing up for all. The class, along with his sermons are a lot to process, but it's a good processing that gives you this peaceful feeling rather than scrambling around hoping to reach the right conclusion yet feeling as though you have no clue where to begin. There was a lot of valuable ideas presented, and he has a way with imagery that is so helpful in visualizing God's role in life. Learning from him helps me to be comfortable in my grayness, my inability to know everything, helps me to feel less pressure to act, to relax, the ability to be free and creative in our faith, and this from a scholar who has studied theology, who knows his shit. Something that also struck me was him talking about rewriting our story, how we rely on our stories as our sense of self. But at some point those stories don't have a hold on us anymore and we become renewed with a truer story. That's some good stuff. Not that my short recap here does any justice.

To continue on with our pursuit of knowledge my friend group is starting a book club, and I am undeniably excited. I much prefer the idea of a book club to something like a Bible study, Bible studies have felt like a chore to me in the past, and if I didn't feel like studying the Bible I was a bad person, although I always get something out of quality time with friends discussing that which is beyond our selves, and I always have something that I'm reading. And all of us are always asking have you read such and such, so if we are all reading such and such it will be so much easier for us to engage in conversation about such and such rather than the person who is reading such and such trying to explain the depth of knowledge being gained, the other person likely not grasping it and then giving up saying "well its good, you should read it".

Everyone at work seems crabby

Apparently there has been a spike in crime near our home. Apparently yesterday their was a drunk man hanging out in the entryway (their are two doors, the first is unlocked and the second is locked and there is a small space in between) of our house just sitting and having a smoke. Apparently he got angry and went ranting down the street when our landlord told him to leave. That's great. I experienced something similar last summer when I went out to my car only to discover a new crackhead friend just chillin' donning only wet (don't want to know why) shorts and dirty socks. However he left (with much effort and little coherence) when asked and without any outbursts of anger or violence. I haven't exactly lived in the safest of neighborhoods in the past so a little crime doesn't freak me out too much, but now I live in Uptown, which I always have thought of as being crime free for the most part. I mean its in the city and of course there is some activity, but certainly not incidents every day of the week blocks from my home. Ah well, what can you do other than be more aware, my mom did give me this keychain thing that makes a really loud piercing sound when you pull the pin, so maybe I should start carrying that around with me. It is far too bulky to actually be a keychain though.

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