birth joy

Whenever I think about women giving birth I think about Oedipus. Anyways, speaking of giving birth, I'm so excited that my dear friend Jenni has birthed a little girl, mostly because now she can drink again, but also because there is a new little person who will probably be pretty cool. She looks kinda chinese and has lots of dark hair, pretty cute as far as (newborn-3 or 4 month) babies go.

Man, this weather is something else. I can't remember the last time it has been this cold and rainy on or near my birthday (Sunday, in case you forgot). Maybe the time I took my friends to Valley Fair in 6th grade. I also remember one year (or that year) my Dad making everyone bratwurst before our outing and nobody eating them even though they were perfectly fine brats, we were just fickle girls. Sometimes I remember those times when I was a royal snot to one of my parents and am filled with shame when I think about how they were just trying to do a good thing for me. I hope his feelings weren't too hurt.

But, I need to be an advocate for myself also.

And, I forgot my hot cocoa today, how disappointing.

disintegration of self

According to my googlescope from the past couple days, my negative outlook on life should start turning around. Or maybe it's the St John's Wort. Lately I've been wondering if I maybe, just maybe, hold on to my negativity because I find it comforting, and I worry if I were to feel better about myself and life I would somehow not be "myself", like it's my schtick or something, as if I would turn into June Cleaver if I didn't have the dark cloud lurking. Could you imagine? I just want my mojo back, not that I've ever had an overflowing abundance of mojo per se, but there has been a marked decline in the past several months.

Anyways, pez dispensers are kinda creepy. The candy comes out of the things neck for chrissakes. Kinda gross if you ask me.

My battle against the bulge continues, after my shocking post CA weight gain I am resolved to get back on track. Can't say I've been entirely successful, am trying though.

Decisions must be made regarding the future semi-soon, scares the bejeezus out of me.

Most recent work distraction is this sometimes hilarious web-comic.

fat and happy

I'm wearing quite an unflattering outfit today. Been having a run of frumpishness as of late in fact, well, pretty much all winter long. Frumpy clothes to fit my frumpy mood. Spring is slow to come this year, probably just as well. Co-worker Rachel and I have decided to succumb to the fat and happy lifestyle, we are just going to eat whatever we desire from here on out and dismiss physical activity.

I've self diagnosed myself as having general anxiety disorder, which is apparently when you feel anxious but can't pinpoint why.

Welp, apparently it is nice outside so maybe I can overcome my laziness and go for a run. I should also brainstorm and write down comic strip ideas...