Monday, June 05, 2006

under pressure

After working my arse off all night friday, getting an early start on Sat. and continuing to work my arse off all day (with help from friend formerly known as Jenny Piepho, her spouse Libra, Cassandra, and finally Jenni, Todd and Kristen) getting the apartment empty and cleaned so that the girls that are moving in could do so per their request, well, at about 5 p.m. my Landlord informs me that one of the girls decided to bail last minute and great news!, we get to stay in our apartment after all for the next month. Yeah, would've been great news a week ago (or even a few hours before), though a little irritating when one is about a half hour from having the place boxed up, moved out, thoroughly cleansed and half of one's shit is sitting out on the porch. I quickly got over it, doinky Landlord apologized and offered his help, the other girl that didn't bail also apologized and offered her help, and I had Cassie to help me move stuff back in and offer support, joined later by Todd to muscle the sofa back inside.

My mother agreed to co-sign for me, I just talked to her a couple hours ago. Can't say she was a wealth of support however, asking me if I was sure this is what I want to do and questioning me taking on another loan. So thats got me questioning my decision now. I mean, thats been the major question, is this really what I want to do? Yes in the way that I think it will be fun, and something that I enjoy doing, and a skill that I'll have under my belt that I can make a decent wage at. If I had unlimited resources? Probably not, but it's better than what I'm doing right now, and everyone else seems to think it's a great idea and are excited for me. I shouldn't let my family get me down I guess, once again, I should see a therapist and maybe get the balls to try and improve relations between myself and my parents, too bad they think I'm weird and I'm fairly certain they don't think I'm too bright either.

We are plugging along in Six Feet Under, I read something online that I wish I hadn't, know something that I wish I didn't know. So while I hope to savor this final season, I want to get on with it since I know too much now.

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