getting up there

I had a long post ranting about religious folk and the gay marriage debate in reaction to the documentary I saw last week following the lives a gay couples during the legalization of gay marriage in MA, and the conflict it caused with the Christian right, culminating in an ammendment to ban gay marriage. Then, like my run on sentence I just wrote, it seemed rather lengthy. So to summarize, I can't foresee the future, but it looks to me as though gay marriage will be someday legalized, and I wonder how Christians can justify spending so much of their energies on putting a stop to it. Yeah, it does suck to reflect upon one's own life and sin, and much easier to judge others', claiming to "hate the sin and love the sinner". Sure, I feel the love when the words perverse and sick are thrown into the equation. The film showed a few of the couples getting legally married and how much that meant to them and the people that love them. I'm not a sappy person, but it brought a tear to my eye. The film was called "Same Sex America" if anyone cares to check it out.

Anywho, I'm exhausted per usual. Betsy and I threw quite a bash Sat. night and I'm still recovering. Good thing I have a couple days off this week, why?, oh because it is my birthday on thursday, I will be old.

OK, I realize that like three people read this thing (one of them being me), but I'm going to become my own stalker and start leaving myself comments since nobody else does.

I'm so funny, I'm so pretty, I'm so popular

I posted a clever ad on craigslist to see if we could possibly wrangle up a roommate or two to find a cool place, and of course my inbox is flooded with responses, well about 15, most of which at first glance at least seem as though they could be cool potential housemates. Of course they all complimented me, practically begging me to choose them. Gushing on and on about how witty I am, and smart and beautiful...oh wait, they have no idea what I look like.

I'm looking like near death today, had a late night last night. Since I'm getting old I no longer bust out on a worknight as often as I used to to drink too many beers, but Betsy convinced me to join her and Sinda to meet their friend Mike at a local bar against my better judgement. We had a rousing conversation about boners, boobs, and butts amongst other things (like art and music). Mike is an attractive young lad, and Betsy and I chatted about how we'd have to fight over him on our walk home, that is if he didn't already have a girlfriend.

So my whining at work finally paid off! Since co-worker Angela will soon be starting an internship as a paralegal and won't be working here as much, they moved her desk and I got her cube, the sweetest spot in the joint. It's flooded with natural light, and while it can't cure my hangover, it does put me in a much better mood.

Tomorrow I will reflect on the film I saw the other night "Same Sex America", it was thought provoking, but I'm barely functioning right now so I'll hold my thoughts.

gremlin in my blog pt 2

tried to publish today's post which resulted in yesterdays post showing up, so now I'll try to publish this post and today's will probably show up...let's find out.

gremlin in my blog

My post from yesterday appears to be lost in cyberspace, not that it was anything to shake a stick at anyways.

I think I'm going to go to a GLBT documentary film tonight, alone, which will probably perpetuate further suspicions of my orientation (fist raised to my other half-gay bethren). Moreso hoping to get some insight into the marriage/religious debate since it is something that interests me. This mean I will have to *gasp* miss tonights fresh episode of GG, hopefully I can tape it if my VCR doesn't get wacky. Logan is in the hospital but I know he won't die, and it will probably just make him and Rory realize that life is too short and they should focus on making their relationship strong. Gag me. Amy Sherman-Palladino and her hubby Dan are ditching out on season 7, lameoids.

the heck

Once again, my hotmail IM has been blocked at work, not that I often have buddies to chat with, just Dan and Jenny, but geez, they sure know how to spoil the fun around here, not that I can't find plenty to distract myself from my work.

Volunteering for the film festival wasn't quite as exciting as I'd hoped for, mostly sitting around doing basically nothing, not that the control freak that I worked with yesterday would have allowed me to do anything anyways. Free popcorn, coffee and festival tickets made it worth it I'd say. Friday nights art crawl rendered me drunk and belligerent, not belligerent really, but just more forthright (read: offensive) than I usually am. Though I may have hurt some feelings, I still had a good time.

My mind is a swirl of stuff, it's all jumbled up.

they are just fine

Matt's pecs are still lovely, holding up very nicely it seems. Instead getting my hair colored a darker brown as I usually do, I requested something more "spring-like", to which Matt suggested highlights. I immediately scoffed at the idea, knowing that upkeep of my hair is not at the top of my priority list, nor within my budget, and I feared unappealing roots. Besides, I've never been a highlight girl, I had blonde and reddish highlights once in college, and since I was busy, poor, and apparently cared little about my appearance I let my hair grow long without ever getting the roots done, or recolored or stripped or anything, half my hair was my natural color and the other half was tri colored. Jenni still makes fun of me about that to this day, I'm sure she thought twice about being my friend. Anyways, he told me they would be subtle, and since I trust Matt's talents, I was convinced. Well, they are subtle, in fact you can barely tell they exist on top of my faded previous dye job. Matt said they look "summery" though, and with his pectorals, I'll buy just about anything he says.

My personal book review of this months book club selection, which was "The Glass Castle" by Jeanette Walls, whom you may be familiar with as a writer for MSNBC. While I did enjoy this memoir of her life with her eccentric parents, an alchoholic father and a mother who found it more important to buy art supplies than food for her kids, I honestly wished it had been more well written. I felt like it was written as a book for adolescents. I don't mean to sound harsh, it also was engaging, interesting, and she did a fine job of relaying her experiences, just something about her writing style turned me off a bit. But hey, I'm no book critic, or a writer for that matter. Next book for our reading enjoyment is "Can You Keep a Secret?" by chick-lit author Sophie Kinsella, writer of the shopaholic books. It should be a light and fun read.

Well, I have a busy, busy weekend ahead, tonight is St. Paul Art Crawl. Tommorrow I'm attending an open house at Art Institute Int'l to hopefully solidify my decision to go there or not. I'm also volunteering at the Film Festival both tommorrow and Sun., not to mention a party thrown by a love interest of a certain galpal of mine whom will remain anonymous so as to not embarass her, but I may forego it in favor of relaxation.

c-ya

no time to waste paid work time on a post today, I'm cutting out early to get a haircut, get paid to eat and opine upon yogurt, enjoy the sunshine and finish the book club book for this evening's book club. Tommorrow there will be an update on Matt's pectorals, a personal book review, and whatever other mundane detail of my life I choose to share.

the addiction

I just went to my length of service appreciation lunch. Five years baby, good grief. I'm not quite sure if I've eaten enough today though, I mean, we had a staff meeting this morning so I piled my plate high with french toast, fruit, bread, and pasta salads, then a buffet lunch which seemed to only consist of fried food. If I'm still here for the 10 year luncheon, someone kick me in the ass pleeeeease.

I still have hope for Jess and Rory. Betsy turned to the dark side because she started watching season 5 when Logan and Rory started dating, now she "understands" how Rory could be in love with Logan. Yeah, I understand too, but I still think they are wrong together. It was painful to see Lorelai get soused and make a fool of herself, I guess it happens to the best of us. I wonder if, like quitting smoking, I'll quit TV series on DVD someday. We are still working on Six Feet Under, I still have some GG to watch and I'm already thinking of what to start watching next, a couple possibilities are Arrested Development and Northern Exposure.

hip to be square

I'm trying to come up with a clever ad, an ad for another roommate or two. Betsy and I are discouraged in our apartment hunt, discouraged and picky and cheap, therefore the 2 bedrooms in our price range in the location we prefer are dumpy/really small. There are lots of 3 bedrooms that are not dumpy and within our price range, so we are trying to wrangle up another roommate via craigslist. Preferably an attractive male with attractive male friends, or a fun female with attractive male friends. I was going to specify that in our ad but Betsy thought it might make us sound desperate.

paranoia

This morning I went down to the basement to retrieve my laundry. My dry clothes were on top of the dryer mixed in with some other clothes and one damp pillow. While sifting through the pile to find all my items, I noticed an unpleasant odor wafting from the pillow, I sniffed it and sure enough, I smelled cat piss. Betsy is continually poking fun at me and telling me I'm paranoid because I'll proclaim on a semi-regular basis that something smells of cat urine. Cleaning the rug on Saturday, cat piss, a damp day sitting on the sofa, cat piss, my slippers, cat piss. I mean, the cat did piss in a variety of places before she got fixed and before I located my brain long enough to figure out I could lock her up in the bathroom, and I'm certain there are crevices I couldn't reach or areas of piss that are unbeknownst to me since I didn't take the time to sniff the entire apartment. Besides, cat piss is a potent smell that some say will never ever ever ever ever ever go away, which is why I'll likely be leaving my oh so comfy sofa on the curb when I move. Anyways, back to this morning, I threw the pillow aside in disgust, gathered my clothing and headed upstairs to resume readying myself for work. Then I sniffed my clothes, cat piss, so I threw them on the floor vowing to take care of them after work since I was already 20 min. late and still had not dried my hair or gathered my lunch together. I scheduled an apartment viewing this afternoon 3 blocks from my place, so I stopped at home first to see if Betsy was around to take a look with me, she wasn't, I looked at the apartment, came home, meanwhile Betsy had returned. I told her about the apartment, we chatted a bit, then I started complaining about the nasty pillow and how it transferred it's nasty stench to my freshly washed clothing. She claimed the pillow as hers and reminded me that the cat had not been in her room, and therefore would not have pissed on the pillow. She chuckled, shook her head and told me I was crazy and paranoid. I invited her to smell my clothes, I sniffed them, nothing, they smelled clean. Thinking that my clothes possible aired out I took her downstairs to the source. She sniffed the pillow and claimed it was fine, I sniffed and once again, clean smelling. I've become a woman who is smelling cat piss when it doesn't exist, look at the damage that Lucy has done.

Easter dinner was not all that I had hoped, my brother bailed so it was just me, literally ONLY ME and my father and stepmother, my stepbrother was working. First of all, it was awkward, conversation with my father is always awkward, Barb (stepmother) eases the awkwardness but she can only do so much. Second the ham was gross, I think it was some wild boar that my dad had bought off some fellow hunter, it was not your run of the mill piggy. Third, Barb thought she had a can of those deep fried onoins to put on the green bean casserole but was mistaken, so she instead put on triscuits, which didn't quite add the same flavor.

ham me up

I didn't quite booze it up as I had hoped, seeing as how I didn't make it to the party. When I got home from work, it was so nice out I had to enjoy a beer and a half on the porch with Betsy and Sinda, get silly and laugh at personal ads, meanwhile my buddy Dan informed me that he may leave earlier than he thought, so I opted to stay in Mpls. Just as well, I've been quite productive today, went running with Betsy, did some much needed cleaning of the apartment, about to work on wome sappy scholarship essays in which I make up a bunch of shit. I'll still be heading home to the farm tomorrow for ham though.

she played a good game folks

That Sally, a fighter 'til the end. All I can say is her character has shone through throughout the show (and will surely continue while she's on the jury), and hello, how rawkin' was she during the challenges? pretty damn rawkin'. Spring is making me a little nostalgic, and maybe a little cheesy, but I sure do miss that Sally Poppins, she's a good woman.

On this good friday I will be drinking booze, and hopefully lots of it. I'll be traversing to the fine city of Mankato, MN to party with my 'ol high school buddy Dan, and maybe, just maybe the guy I crushed on for like five years will be there. Then I will proceed to spend an exciting weekend in Owatonna, culminating in a meal prepared by my father and stepmother that will surely consist of ham to celebrate the resurrection of our Lord and Savior.

I see london, I see france

I've got some bad hair going on, hair that hasn't been cut since Christmas, but that will be rectified one week from today. I was sitting outside at the local shop last night talking on the phone to FP, and this guy gestured to me that my underwear was showing, which I really didn't appreciate to be honest. Perhaps my undies on view makes me appear to be sluttish, tasteless, trashy, unkempt or what have you, but I truly was not concerned about it and was irritated that he felt the need to gesture to me while I was clearly on the phone. Then I felt self conscious, but then again I always feel self conscious.

nature or nurture

INFP - "Questor". High capacity for caring. Emotional face to the world. High sense of honor derived from internal values. 4.4% of total population.

Free Jung Personality Test (similar to Myers-Briggs/MBTI)

Just been reading up on my personality type, which you can read about here or here if you care to. No wonder I'm weird and often frustrated about my life and myself. In trying to find some direction, I've been doing career/personality tests. I had this book laying around that my former analyst recommended to me and I finally took the tests and was well, dissapointed. I scored highest in business and clerical, and lowest in mechanics, which I used to always score well in, but then I thought about it and realized that out of the five tests I took 3 while drunk which may have skewed my results. Anyways I have never thought of myself as business oriented, and it said I could do boring jobs like being an accountant. So I still lack clarity but am forging on.

Gilmore Girls was also a dissapointment, it did not yield the results that I had hoped for. Rory went to Jess's reading in Philly, a kiss was shared, then she proclaimed her love for Logan even though she doesn't trust him, Jess was clearly saddened and hurt. I'm entirely at a loss as to how one could resist Jess's charms, he's attractive, apart of an artist community, creative, sarcastic, straightforward, if only he was an actual person and in love with me...

I'm feeling as though I may get frustrated with this task of finding an apartment with Betsy. She is on a tighter budget than I am and while I'm all about being more thrifty with rent, however, I also can afford a decent place that isn't unreasonable. She also wants certain amenities, like a yard and more space, so to find a place like that in her range we would probably have to move to a less desireable location, whereas, again, I could afford a decent place in our current neighborhood which I am quite fond of. Yesterday we looked at a place that the woman was certain we would like. It had no living room, it was 2 bedrooms (1 quite small) a bathroom and a fairly large kitchen that she said we could put our sofa and TV and such in. Betsy was interested, I wasn't into it, I foresee issues.

the shame

I've decided to try not to feel guilty anymore, it's really just too much of a burden.

Good show last night, though I nearly fell asleep during transition between the opening band (The Elected) and Metric, and my feet hurt really bad, and I didn't want to move for fear of losing my spot (one disadvantage of being alone) so I didn't smoke or use the potty the entire 4 hours I was there, it was still worth it. Of course I had to observe my lack of coolness in comparison to all the hipsters, or rather my lack of ability perhaps to put together a convincing image.




Note how fit and sexy the lead singer's legs are, and the when the band came back for the encore the lead guitarist was smoking, smoking! inside! I wasn't sure if he just was unaware of the ban or disregarded the ban with a fuck you smoking ban attitude, in any case, he was hot.

It's getting to be apartment hunting time again. Sounds like Betsy has now decided to stick around so we are finding a place together, though we have some discrepancy on location and how much we are willing to pay so we'll see what we can agree upon.

warm as balls (it's about time)

It is a glorious 70 degrees outside, which I sorta got to enjoy while waiting for my car to get serviced (oil change). I took a stroll to Jimmy Johns for a yummy sandwich, had a smoke, pondered life, now I'm back at work getting sleepy. There were some rapid fans of Bob Seger at Jimmy Johns, I don't remember which song was playing but one employee knew every single word and sang them out loud.

My friends are lame per usual, as I will be attending a show (Metric) tonight at first ave. and it appears I will be attending by my lonesome. Co-worker Rachel agreed to go but now may back out because she is too tired. Good grief. I guess if I had more than three friends, I would possibly have more potential concert going companions, but alas, I do not.

resist the temptation

I was unable to watch Survivor last night due to an excursion to Chaska to see Cassies's school and see her student's art and musical talent. I'm trying to resist the temptation to look online and see if Sally was voted off or not, I asked Jenni but she refused to tell me. It makes me nervous, but no, I refuse to look.

Tonight brings the long overdue return of a Six Feet Under night with Cassie and Sarah, loooong overdue. Low key weekend is what I'm hoping for.

alert the fashion police

Work is kicking my rear today, and the hated nurse kept hovering near me, I pretended to be intensly into my work and ignored her, but I was incredibly annoyed. She hovered for like 5 minutes, just hovered, didn't say anything, didn't ask anything, just stood there, waiting.

I made a decision (I think), to try to go to the Art Institutes Int'l this summer instead of Le Cordon Bleu. I'm a little sad, I really liked the admission rep at Le cordon Bleu, but I guess that is part of her job, to be likeable. Unless I decide to do something else entirely, like become an accountant, or a truck driver.

Jess will be back on Gilmore Girls next week, though in my Gilmore Girl obsessed state I looked for spoilers for upcoming episodes and have dimished hope of Jess and Rory actually getting together. Besides, Jess is in another WB show (or the actor who plays Jess), which I may have to start watching because Jess is so attractive, but I'm guessing this is a bad sign that he would be on the next season of Gilmore Girls. I still have hope however.

Speaking of hope, I finally finished A Fine Balance on Sunday, the book I had chosen for our book club, highly recommend (try to ignore/hide the Oprah book club stamp), but be prepared to be left with a feeling of despair once you are finished.

I'm wearing black and navy blue today (denim), but Betsy assured me it was okay, so I'm trying to not feel lame.

such a brave little toaster

lewd pirate cake
Originally uploaded by snielson.

I really need to get me a decent digital camera...but look at my pirate cake I made, isn't it impressive, it says "happy b-day, you put the shiver in me timber" (I stole that off the 'net, I'm not quite witty enough to come up with that on my own). Anyways, I think all involved had a good time friday night, there was dancing, mural drawing, a cake variety, and other misc. debauchery (no, that does not include me getting action). I also wouldn't shut up about my love for the animated feature "The Brave Little Toaster"

I had a uncomfortable/lovely time with my family yesterday. Though my brother and I are well into adulthood, neither of us have a car that would be trustworthy to drive the 3ish hours it took to get to my Grandpa's birthday party, well my bro doesn't have a license much less a car. Anyways, us three kids, myself, brother and step-brother scrunched into the back of the Suburu. Not only did the Suburu smell like sheep had been stored in it, but I, being of the smallest stature, got the most uncomfortable seating arrangement. We headed off to the casino in Granite Falls to celebrate. While waiting for the man of the hour to show, I lost a total of $6 gambling, $5 of which were given to me by my step-mother though so I didn't take too much of a hit to my pocket. Whatever happened to your run of the mill slot machine?, I was too confused to properly gamble. Eventually Grandpa and Crystal showed, I was anxious to meet this woman who had stolen my Grandpa's heart, and well, it is a bit strange. As we ate in the casino cafe, I pondered exactly what this 47 year old woman was doing with my 90 year old grandfather, I came up with hell if I know. She is pleasant though, and takes good care of him. She did express her dissapointment at being the only black person in Ivanhoe, the small farming community where my Grandpa was born and has lived his entire life. So, I don't get it, but oh well, live and let live.

Gross, I just overheard a nurse talking about the stuff you can pick up from the tubing when you get a colonoscopy, ick.

Anyways, I spent a bit of time at my ma's house after dropping my bro off. We're sitting around chatting, and then my bro yells out Joel so and so is on the scanner, and my mom goes running off to find out what kind of trouble this Joel is in. Doug, familiar with cop codes determined it had something to do with drunkeness, and stealing gas. "Who is this Joel guy" I inquired of my mother, "Oh, an old boyfriend of mine" was her reply. She then goes on to tell me about how he was a "cooner", apparently an expert in petty theft and often homeless, though he did get my mother to appreciate the blues. Of course this lead to the subject of my single state, my mom not understanding why I don't have an S.O. since I'm a nice girl, not a "floosey", which then led to the discussion of the advantages of being asexual with my brother.

My brother by the way, seems to be clean and getting his shit together. He's meditating in the sauna, gone entirely organic, and is planning on moving to Seattle. He still believes in James Frey, but whatever, I just hope he stays on track.