drama

The most drama I've had lately is moving office spaces, losing my battle for a window, and maybe getting my car towed a couple weeks ago, some problems with the landlord, but that's more personal to Olivia.
Last year at around this time I had all sorts of drama, mostly due to a relationship that wasn't exactly healthy, I cried all the time and was pretty much an emotional mess. I decided to try out therapy cause it was clear I have some serious issues that I wasn't dealing with very well. I don't know that I'm any better now, I don't cry as much, but I don't know what that means, I don't think I'm better. I feel like I could just as easily get into a similar situation now. So now I live drama free and boring. I have my Gilmore Girls, One tree hill, Seinfeld if I can stay up that late. I work, try to chip away at my debt. I check out Sex and the City from the Library and live vicariously. I think about how I want to move out east, what that requires me to do, if I'll actually do it. How I should paint. I go to the local coffee shop, get coffee or tea, depending on how much I feel I need to combat my smoking habit, read or journal, smoke. Have beers with my friends, try to check out an art opening or gallery from time to time.
I don't know which is better, drama or non. I sit with my friends and feel like I don't have much of interest to talk about regarding my personal life. So I pull out something, so and so was irritating at work, ummm...this funny thing happened when I was babysitting, I can't assemble that damn ikea chair, I really had to work hard to get that screw in the wall, my brownies didn't turn out, I got a good parking spot today. Or I talk about someone else's more interesting life. No family drama (I rarely see or talk to anyone in my family), no friend drama, no man drama, only my inner psyche drama that I don't feel like sharing, cuz its only dramatic to me.
Drama has feeling involved, whirlwind emotions, stupid or exciting choices. It has its drawbacks, there can be a high pain potential, scary changes, life damaging consequences of stupid choices. Or it cna lead you to the best thing ever. Usually "drama" involves the opposite sex, (or same sex if you're gay), that's when it's most exciting to dish the dirt, about you or someone else. It can be fun, something to laugh over, adds excitement, possibly when you feel "the most alive", ranges of emotions are being felt from one minute to the next.
It gets wearing though, and I still don't have much idea of what I'm doing with my life. I hope its okay to just have some coffee at the local shop and smoke...