frustration

Lucy got a clean bill of health at the vet, turns out she just needs to get fixed. I'll spare the details of what I learned about female cats and reproduction, but in a nutshell, she's going to be in heat more frequently until she gets some, and she's marking in order to attract a mate. Poor sexually frustrated Lucy. It is definitely a bargain to adopt a pet, spaying is expensive.

Quasi celebrity pal Beth was in town over the weekend, with her quasi celebrity sisters and quasi blog-celebrity beau employed Tim (formerly unemployed Tim), whom I had the privelage to see friday night. I thought I had it in me to be functioning at the second bar, but instead I was quite slap happy, babbling nonsense while trying not to fall asleep on the table, that would have been embarassing. Fortunately it brought out a rare form of humor that is only experienced when I'm in such a state. My weird ex-neighbor dropped by the other evening to hang out, we've never hung out before, nor have I even talked to her much in the short time we've known each other, but she seems to consider me to be one of her good friends. I wish I liked her more because she seems lonely but honestly it is so awkward being around her that I try to avoid it if possible.

House of Mercy put on a great show last night for their monthly live at the Turf Club, Betsy and her friends joined me and she observed that I go to a hip church, and I'd have to agree. I must say though that the HOM band isn't quite the same without Pete and Abby.

would you?

In the words of Jeff Probst, Sally totally "dominated" that challenge last night, she was zipping around on that balance beam like a cat in heat who has just spied a potential mate (sorry, Lucy's horny howls are still disrupting my slumber). That was quite the tribal counsel though, we were pretty confident that it would be Ruth Marie, but still, it was a bit nervewracking. We were pondering the question how much money it would take for us to consider it worth it to be on Survivor, minimum was 10 grand. My wonderful co-worker Angela (whom I dearly love despite our differences) claims she wouldn't be on it even if she won the million, it wouldn't be worth it for her to starve and not sleep, this doesn't surprise me since she barely even leaves her apartment. Anyways, one week closer to those pancakes.

I myself was on TV last night, the local news came to our staff meeting yesterday because co-worker Stef's brother was in Iraq and our office sent his unit several care packages, so he came to our meeting to do a little show and tell about his time spent there. I had mixed feelings, being that I'm not thrilled about the war, yet seeing and hearing about these young men that are there and so dedicated to the effort, interesting to hear about it from a first hand source. In any case, I'm amongst the crowd of nurses and you could see me if held a magnifying glass up to the screen.

I accidentally washed Betsy's phone in wash machine while trying to be helpful, see, Lucy has this peeing issue and if you leave an article of clothing lying around, she will pee on it, like she did Betsy's vest. After discovering what had occurred, I promptly put it in the wash without checking the pockets, like the moron that I can often be. She's so great though, she was completely cool about it, what a good roommate I have. I'm taking Lucy to the vet tomorrow so hopefully her bladder issues will be remedied.

quirky

He's a quirky one, that landlord of ours. Betsy's friend Sinda takes Tango lessons from our Dan (the landlord), so she knows him better than Betsy or I and was giving Betsy tips on how best to deal with him. Unfortunately he shuts down when he feels attacked, so we had to go the "stroke his ego" route, so instead of telling him off our first plan was to be nice. Sinda also emphasized the fact that he has a brain comparable to the size of a Dinosaur's. I was to the point where I was okay with the prospect of moving, but Betsy wants to finish out the school year at her job with the Y so she was planning on staying through May, then likely moving back to California after that, so it would be incredibly inconvenient for her to move twice in 2 months. So our proposal was that we would be allowed to stay until the end of May, after which the girls could take our apartment. We included the girls in our discussion and they are discussing it and will get back to us by tomorrow, but I'm pretty sure they'll go for it. They aren't as snooty as I made them out to be, and Betsy and I figured Dan just promised them the room thinking I would be leaving and then when I wasn't decided it would be better to screw us over since they are signing a new lease and we aren't (and he's a pervert and they are cuter than we are), but they seemed 90% okay with the idea and said it wasn't their intention to kick us out. I still have to move end of May but I'll deal with that later. Betsy and I agreed we will miss each other, she suggested I move to San Francisco with her.

Haha, I also found out that Dan thinks I'm a lesbian, because I'm "cute enough" to get a guy to date me, so why do I not have a significant other? Clearly it's because I'm attracted to women and I don't even know it yet. That is what he told Betsy when he dragged her on some excursion to deliver a subpeona for him (also weird), she wasn't supposed to tell me but she was tipsy. Actually, I think most of the guys at the coffee shop think I'm a lesbian too, because I'm often alone, or with a gal pal, but really I'm just a loner.

I got a decent night sleep, Lucy is still horny but I noticed that she was mostly perched on top of the chair looking out the window to call out to her lover, so I closed the curtains and that seemed to help. The only one she can try to hook up with in the apartment is George, and he's a dud in the sack.

Bummer, Common is going to be at first ave. tonight, sadly I cannot afford to go. Why couldn't he come next week after I've gotten my tax refund, because the world is against me, that's why.

haha sucka's

Not only did I get the overdraft fees reversed that I was supposed to, she also reversed the 2 that I would have gotten, I love you bank lady!! Ah, for once I see the fruits of my labors, not to mention in some miniscule way screwing the bank, instead of being the screwee that I often am.

well, that sucks

In miscalculating how much money I had in my checking account, I just have discovered that I've overdrawn my account...a lot, I'm pretty sure that talking to a banker will get me absolutely nowhere, but heck, I'll give it my best shot. I also love how they always cash the highest amounts first and act like it is for your benefit when really it's so they can fuck you more. Eureka! I may get somewhere, turns out my savings account that I specifically set up for overdraft protection somehow did not get linked, she's "looking into it" right now. Hot Dog, I got fees reversed, yipee!, my heart can now return to it's previously lowered rate. I don't know MS flava, the way I handle money, as well as the likeliness that I won't be marrying any sugar daddies, it may be in my best interest to keep my 401k around and gaining interest.

In all my ranting yesterday I forgot to mention that it was Olivia's birthday, Happy Birthday Olivia! AND I just received news that my friend and Partylite compadre Erica just gave birth to a baby girl.

Betsy and I are meeting with our landlord tonight, even if we are unsuccessful in the end, I want him to know that we felt like we were treated unfairly especially since we are really good tenants.

I'm tired, Lucy (the cat) has been keeping me awake due to her being horny and expressing it vocally in the wee hours of the night. You really should get her fixed Olivia.

brief update/rant variety

So, apparently if our landlord gives us one month notice, he can kick us out since we are on a month to month lease. He's still a dick, he even said that we are better tenants than those girls, but they are signing a year lease, so they get the room. I just think of all the things Olivia and I let slide and could've reported him for and it pisses me off, Betsy has helped him a lot as well, even if only to listen to him talk nonsense. What irks me the most is that he keeps making shit up about what was said or agreed upon, according to him Betsy and I said things that we never said, and he keeps changing his story. I wish we could stay legally just to stick it to him, but I'm afraid if we are going to try to stay we have to negotiate. Betsy was planning on possibly moving out end of May anyways I guess so we are going to see if that is feasible.

Thing is I still want to move out east, though since I was told how stupid it would be for me to cash out my retirement that means I have at least a few more months before my credit card debt is clear, and I should attempt to clean up my credit, and also save. So as much as I don't want to be locked into another lease here, it would probably be to my benefit to just stick around and get more financially stable.

I have to get a new rim for my tire, and the cat peed on my bed yesterday. Alright, that is enough ranting for today.

update: landlord idiocy continues

I just talked to my landlord to hopefully gain clarification, but am only more confused. Of course his and Betsy's stories don't match up, he claims she told him she'd be out end of March. Betsy says she specifically asked him in January (after she was told she can stay) if he wanted her to move out and he said no, whereas he tells me that the girls always wanted the room, so then why the hell didn't he ask Betsy to leave when she offered. He's going to try to talk to Betsy tonight so maybe things will be worked out then. I feel like Betsy is getting a raw deal, and I tried to defend our case but I wasn't there when they were talking terms so I can't say that I know such and such was said, only Betsy can do that. And yes, I should comb over my lease to see if I have any leverage there.

getting the boot

Down the hall from Betsy and I live 2 trim and cute gals, they share the studio apartment. They seem to do laundry nonstop (probably from changing their cute little hipster outfits 3-4x/day), come off a bit snobby (at least one does), and now have bitched to the point that Betsy may be getting the boot, and me along with her. Their beef is nothing personal against Betsy, especially since I don't think either of us has said more than 5 words to them in the past few months. My landlord told me in passing yesterday, "I'm going to be needing Betsy's room end of March". See, apparently our landlord promised them Betsy's room to be available for April. Betsy's room is by itself across the hall from the rest of our apartment which is why they can take the room and essentially tack it on to their apartment. After I processed this information, I got a little pissed, and in talking to Betsy (also pissed) we concluded there has been some discrepancy in verbal agreements between our dear landlord and his tenants. Discrepancy's and other fun facts are as follows:

a.) When Betsy first moved in, she and landlord agreed that she would only stay until the end of January because the other girls wanted the room. Betsy said that they were offered the room 2 times and refused each time, after which landlord told her to stay as long as she wanted and she said she wanted to stay until the summer.

b.) I told landlord that I had applied for a job and might possibly move in March. Never did I say it was a set in stone deal, apparently he took it as such and went with it.

c.) I figure since the girls refused the room twice, they are now exempt from having choice on if/when they get the room.

d.) They were the ones that decided to share an overpriced studio apartment.

e.) The reason the bitching started is b/c landlord asked for extra money for the higher heating costs (we all knew of the added cost), I overheard the part of the bitching where she was saying that they were promised Betsy's room. Neither Betsy or I bitched about the extra heating cost, nor do we constantly do laundry using hot water (likely the reason for the incredibly high heating bill), we are clearly much better tenants....with an idiot landlord.

f.) I like Betsy and even though she is disgustingly messy, she's become not only a roomate but a friend.

g.) It is a pain in the ass to move, and I would like to avoid it if possible, but I might just on principle since our landlord is clearly moronic.

So Betsy is going to have a little talk with our landlord, unfortunately I don't know if we have any legal ground to stand on but we might, pretty much everything has been verbal, not written down. It is really irritating because he is stupid, as in he doesn't listen, nor does he communicate well. Our problem is we don't bitch enough, so we get the shaft, we need to get our bitch on.

In the presence of greatness

Excitement in store for this evening, my quasi-celebrity reality TV pal will be gracing us with her presence, along with her boy-toy MS Flava. I'm itching to get off work and enjoy some jovial times watching Survivor and spending QT with these fine people (along with my other fabulous friends, but they aren't as exciting since they live here).

the end is near, and someone(s) loves me afterall

In a very un-Charlie Brown like moment, I came home to a valentine in my mailbox from not one, but 3 very attractive and creative men vying for my attention; Kanye West, Jamie Foxx and Common. Apparently they all have the hots for me.

As much as I'd like to live in the fantasy that these men, though they have never met me, are famous and certainly have attractive women fawning over them all the time, I suspect that one of my funny gal pals put it together (main suspects being Fuj or Betsy, Fuj denies it though so I'm pretty sure it was Betsy). In any case they were f-ing hilarious and totally made my day. The rest of the evening was anti-climatic and involved me going to the gym and discovering how out of shape I am, watching the valentine Charlie Brown special, Gilmore Girls and the movie "Love Jones" as previously planned. There was a brief moment where Cassie and I almost decided to go out, but we each opted for our jammies and our respective televisions.

Something else that is swell is that I'm can see the light at the end of the tunnel, i.e. my credit card debt will be paid off in fewer than 10 months, if I didn't decide to quit my job, cash out my retirement and use that to finish them off, which I may still do, though my financial advisor advised against that course of action. I suppose in theory I should save for the future, but that is all in theory.

crisis averted

Breathing a sigh of relief at thwarting potentially really bad things happening to my checking account, surely rendering me homeless, thankfully, I will remain with home for at least the time being.

Oh yes, tomorrow is Valentine's day. I have a sultry date with my television, who will display a fresh episode of Gilmore Girls for me, after that we may get the DVD player involved and watch old episodes of Gilmore Girls, or maybe even a movie, the remote and I will get all snuggly and drink tea.

Cassie and I finished another movie off in our movie rampage, yesterday we ticked the Narnia movie off our list, then played a resounding game of skeeball (Big Buck Hunter having already been occupied). Even though I'm no longer a Christian I did enjoy the movie, I just tried to ignore the Biblical overtones.

crows feet

I was in that "I'm getting old" mood last night again, thinking about how in about 3 months I'll be 27, 3 years beyond that and I'll hit 30. I mean seriously, I'll soon be in my "late 20's", well, I better not think too hard, I'll get depressed, as I often do when I think too hard.

That said I'm in a better mood, my finances are in a dire state, not that that's new, I finally got my car back after I got swindled by Autopia. Having the ladies over tonight for book club, that may sound lame for a friday night, but we'll have a rip roaring good time, and hopefully indulge in a bit o live music performed by Truth before he goes on tour.

what happened to that global warming

No, it isn't Subzero, and we've only had one real cold snap early this winter, but temps have fallen to more of a normal range(single digits warming up to mid 20's), and I didn't wear my hat this morning, it was chilly.

I've been in a bad mood since Tuesday, feeling some stress, thinking about starving and repressed people in the world so I can keep things in perspective. On a good note I think the mouse left, I can hold on to that.

if it's not one thing, it's another

Finally reunited with the latest Fiona album, I forgot to bring it to work today in my haste to catch the bus, it is a recent addition to my collection so we are in the honey moon phase in which I want to listen to it on repeat. Angsty, just what I need.

My taxes are confusing me this year due to stupid Partylite. I did not make a significant amount of income from it at all, so do I even need to include it? I have no idea, any accountants out there that want to offer free tax advice?

Well, I did a little sketching last night here at the local shop, trying to, dare I say it, solidify an idea for a painting. Yes, I have a goal people, I should just keep my mouth shut so I don't get held up to it. This is why I always hesitate to share my goals, for fear that somewhere down the line someone will be like, "hey, weren't you going to start that llama and camel farm in the rocky mountains by August of '05", and then I have to be like "uh yeah, it just didn't work out", when really I was just lazy and afraid of change. Anyways, there is this very not a big deal annual art show at a local church that if I get motivated I could submit a painting to, so that is my goal.

Finally saw Brokeback Mountain over the weekend (as well as Purple Rain which was the midnight movie). Quite enjoyed it, brought some thoughts to the surface about lack of ability to share emotion, Ennis reminded me a bit of my father, his difficulty in sharing emotion (not his being gay, though who really knows I guess my dad could be in the closet), and my dad has always wanted to be some cowboy/rancher type out west. Maybe its because I'm never up with current events, but I'm also surprised that there hasn't been more controversy surrounding the film from religious folk, though like I say, maybe I just haven't been paying attention.

we meet

Mouse infestation is confirmed, I saw Lucy run excitedly, Betsy was brave and moved the object to reveal the vermin, it ran through my room and appears to be residing there as I type this. The cats are poised for attack, perhaps they will be victorious. Ick ick ick, that is so disgusting. I will name the mouse Mopie, I figure it will be around for awhile so we may as well get on more friendly terms.

happy/sad

Dearest Olivia is staying in Vienna, this is happy, yet sad b/c I was looking forward to possible reunification. Someday though, someday.

I'm happy because Sally did not get kicked off survivor on the first show, her tribe did very well, and I was amused at her lack of concern for the dead turtle. I've got hope for them pancakes.

Yet I'm sad because I just learned the the only bar I've been to in Boston closed or is closing soon, The Littlest Bar, where I spent 2 of the only 3 hours that I've ever spent in Boston last winter. A tiny place with good people. I had a dog on my lap, met a man who picked up Jesus posing as a hitchhiker, and was well taken care of, don't think I paid for nary a pint, but left with a sufficient buzz to face the bitter cold. It was a pub I know my friends would love and had hoped that on the roadtrip that we will actually take someday, we could've stopped there. Ah well.

Sad that my car is dead, but happy that Kevin is going to fix it for me.

I've got good pals, that makes me happy.

your 'sota fans

Sally's gonna be smokin' hot on the premier of Survivor tonight, ya'll should check out our beloved friend and cheer her on. Here's to you Sally (picture imaginary toast), may your game be on, your schemes be clever, and your luck be good.

I also just received 3 season of Gilmore Girls on loan from my beloved co-worker, don't be too shocked if you see me away from the TV folks, I'm sure it's only temporary.

whatchu lookin' at?

dirty kitchen
Originally uploaded by snielson.

There is possibility of vermin in our apartment. I have not yet seen any vermin, but the cats stare steadily under the fridge or stove or up at the pantry, just sitting...watching...I peered underneath, trying to shine a flashlight so to see if I could spy some beady little eyes or a hairless tail, but I couldn't see all the way to the back.

The possibility of vermin does not surprise me...take note of the grossness that is our kitchen (and yes, that is our kitchen it is that small). Recycling will pile up for days, floor is consistently unswept, dishes may be washed but you'd be lucky to find a wiped down surface. Betsy is good about washing the dishes, but other than that any cleaning is usually done by me, and it isn't any secret that I'm not very tidy. Critters can feast in our home for days, maybe it will cozy up in my bed with me. Ahhh, I just recalled the time when Olivia and I had a mouse and it peed on her bed. Oh, and the time the bat fell on my wrist, and when I kicked the mouse accidentally when I lived with my brother and that other guy. Can there be a new little creature to run screaming from and be completely disgusted by, a new vermin to share our humble home with? Lets hope not.

uh, who stole my cheese?

Granted, I stole the cheese in the first place, BUT only b/c the fridge was being cleaned out and had thrown the cheese (string cheese, perfect for snacking) in the garbage b/c it was maybe a week beyond it's sell by date, obviously still acceptable to be eaten in my book. So I plucked the cheese from the garbage (it was wrapped in plastic, so not as disgusting as it sounds). Now, the cheese is gone, who took it? If it was the original owner, fine, even though if it wasn't for me that cheese would be rotting away in some trash heap.

My eye hurts (another stroke coming on?), my car died again, and now this...the cheese I stole has been stolen.

I went to hear Camille Paglia do a book reading a.k.a. ranting about whatever she felt like last night. It was quite the entertainment, and now I want to be a genius, or at least actively learn more, or at least read more (poetry amongst other things).
However, this event did require me to miss the State of the Union Address, and since I'm not much into politics, I don't think (according to the rapper I saw at First Ave. on Sat.), therefore stunting the growth of my potentially genius brain. Oh well.

come together

So I gave some money to the guy that goes door to door asking for donations for the environmentalist organization he's apart of a few months ago. Now, every month or so I get an email regarding current issues and something practical we can do to help out. Today's email was about global warming, so I spent a bit of time reading up on global warming, and now I'm paranoid about global warming. I'm thinking I should accomplish any major life goals in the next few months, travel, land a husband, pop out at least one kid, buy a house. I better get a move on, or start rallying my community to be more environmentally aware.

Most of the time when I see a guy wearing makeup, I think boy, that guy looks really hot with that black eyeliner. I'd like to see more guys wearing makeup.

I wonder

I was reading an article in Bethel's monthly? publication for alums regarding sexuality and homosexuality over at Jenni's. After finishing the articles, I told Jenni that I don't think I'm a Christian. Let's see, I haven't cracked open my Bible in months, when I do I rarely try to "get into the word", reading into verses what I want them to say rather than what they actually say. I sin, and most of the time if I haven't done any major damage to myself or someone else, I continue to do so because well, it's fun. I mean, I was reading this article, profs talking about the scriptures that say that homosexual acts (not being a homosexual in and of itself) are sinful, and through grace a person with homosexual tendencies can either remain celibate, or entirely change their orientation. The question was posed on when someone should be separated from the Christian community based on their unwillingness to change. Who the hell decides that? First of all only an obvious "sin", such as being gay, having an addiction, an affair, looking at porn, having premarital sex, etc. (all of which can be hidden, so you never even know the people you are in community with) what about the other shit that people take part in every day, judgement, materialism, gluttony, laziness, it's been my experience that these issues are not as severe.

Apparently I have no faith, I don't always feel strong against temptation, like I can be faced with temptation to sin and I'll pray and Jesus will give me a way out simple as that. Not to mention that the sins I'd be most judged for are the least of my worries. I'm most satisfied when I look back and see the ways that I've grown into myself, things that are hard sometimes, like being open and achieving intimacy in relationships, being honest with people in a way that is sincere and caring, being honest with myself, seeking passion, living in the moment, accepting people however they are. I feel heavy when I think about all these things, keeping a checklist of my rights and wrongs, did I pray, did I read my Bible, I was materialistic, I ate too much, I smoked, I drank too much, I fooled around with some random guy, I was rude to a coworker, or I talked about her behind her back, I don't volunteer or try to better my community, etc. I mean it's a ridiculous amount of things that I do on a daily basis in which I fall short, some I want to change, some I don't care to right now, when do I get separated according to Paul?, should've been done a long time ago, am I supposed to be beating myself up everyday for my lack of will and faith?

let's be honest

I take back any feelings of sympathy I had for James Frey, he lied about far too much to in any way justify it, at least I checked his book out from the library rather than paying hard earned cash for it, money being an obvious motivation.

Cassie kicked me in the ass last night, in a good way. Instead of beating around the bush and falling back on MN nice technique, I am challenging myself to be straight with someone as well, to learn to be forward, yet tactful.

isn't that sweet

50 Cent and Mobb Deep got tatoos to show their loyatlty to each other, but what if they have beef down the line, then they have tatoos to painfully remind them of what once was.

I was chatting with my coffee shop buddy last night, who is a musician, and he seems to think that I could have a good voice based on my speaking voice, perhaps I really do have untapped vocal talent. I have always wanted to be a rocker chick, but Cassie fits that role so much better since she's bad-ass and drums, I'm too shy and naive.

The weather is so springlike today, looking forward to the day when it is safely spring, and we can sit outside and drink beer with the sun beating down on us, grill and drink beer, read in the sun and drink beer, etc. etc.

Does anyone else feel bad for James Frey? How humiliating must that be to be called out like that on a national level, and I loved his book. Of course now the book doesn't pack the same punch. I wonder if he was sitting with Oprah that first time and thinking, "oh shit, I could potentially be in deep here." It took some balls to go back on her show though. Hmm, I don't know what to think about it, in one sense I feel like I've been duped and part of me feels bad for the guy for having such a high and low in a short period of time. It could potentially push him into using again, I know I'd sure like a stiff drink or ten after something like that.

in my pocket?

When I had to have my car towed, almost 3 weeks ago, I wrote a check. This check has not yet been cashed, I have hope that they lost it and it's just money in my pocket. Watch me spend it and then they cash it months later and I lose hundreds in overdraft fees, and I'll be forced to either be homeless and panhandle or move in with my mother.

I'm afraid I've gotten hooked on the reality show "beauty and the geek" which is on tonight after another favorite, "one tree hill". Both fine examples of high quality television of which I'm not ashamed to indulge. I almost made it to work on time today (8:12!), so I can leave with ample time to do my other work, pick up cat litter, and head home for an exhilirating evening of TV.

follow your heart

Choir wasn't as fun as I had hoped, I don't like the song and I was by far the youngest person there, there may have been a couple people in their 30's but most are geriatric, so my fantasy of meeting a sexy choir boy will not come to fruition. I'll try and stick it out though, at the very least there are treats every week.

I'm really trying to work on being on time to work, but I'm still about 20 minutes late each morning. I'm so rude to people here, as in I'm irritable, and I don't try to hide it. So now I'm trying to be nice to this lady on the phone when before I was clearly annoyed because I have to explain things five times, but she continues to be kind towards me so I'm trying to adjust my attitude. Why do I get more irritated with someone when they ask me to do something for them nicely, I don't know really, but it really grates on me when someone comes over all sugar sweet, I think I find it condescending.

Hmm, look at me consistently writing about how irritated I get with my job, yet do I do anything about, no. I'm so lame sometimes.

I wanna be sedated

Tonight is my first night of choir. Those of you that have heard me sing may be wondering why I would subject a choir to my vocal err...talents. Well, I actually have decent pitch and and can blend well in a choir, it's when I sing by myself that there is a problem, though I have sang a couple of duets in my day with my old friend Julia such as the Star Spangled Banner during HS sporting events. Anyways, I've always enjoyed choir so I'm excited to have a casual weekly time of singing sacred choral music.

I just read today that scientists are working on making cultured meat. They take cells from an animal, "culture" them, and can enhance the meat with various nutrients, saving the animals from poor and inhumane farming conditions, as well as making the meat healthier, AND helping to relieve starvation. Interesting.

I'm not a loser after all

I had 3 friends at the party (one that I regret inviting), five if you count the 2 guests Rachel brought as my friends by default. Betsy on the other hand had approx. 25 friends and acquaintances that showed, it was very crowded in our tiny place, but quite fun, I did not however, get laid.

I will now proceed to laze about, or maybe clean.

crabby and short

Unfortunately I haven't been trained in the fine details of nursing, and yet I'm expected to know proper names of medications. Oh how I hate when Sandy is not here and I have to do her shit, she's one of those types that goes above and beyond, so the nurses are spoiled, then when I don't know what the hell I'm doing, I get my head bitten off, or the general impression is that I'm dumb. So today I've been crabby and short.

Betsy and I are having a little shindig tomorrow, I have no friends that will be attending, this may make me look like a loser. Not that we even have space for a large party.

well, I guess some people have fulfilling jobs

Betsy and I were chatting the other day, she was lamenting about going further into debt and not having a fulfilling job. I almost scoffed, thinking who in their post liberal arts college 20's has a fulfilling job?, especially those of us with degrees in the arts (hers in Literature). So her parents want her to move home and go back to school, tell her that she's wasting her time, blah, blah. I feel bad for her, her mother is an engineer. Frankly I think she has a fulfilling job(s), she works with kids, she tutors, she just got a job at a bookstore, all those sound like desireable jobs to me, though they don't pay all that well. Then again I have a penchant for mediocrity, so just about anything other than what I'm doing sounds fine to me. Or I could compare myself to peers that actually do impressive things with themselves and get really depressed. I prefer to slog through my days and drink my cares away.

being flexible

Well, I was going to go to IKEA and hunt for something that will eliminate cat pee smell (not at IKEA, at the vet), but now I have happy hour plans. Perhaps some wine will release some of my anxiety. I wonder if I have any vinegar at home, hmmmm.

Lata sucka's

Oh bother

Feeling a bit eeyoreish today, a bit stressed about things. I've got holiday lumpiness that I discovered through some ill-fitting clothing that wasn't previously ill-fitting. Things are more up in the air then I like, which means I have to make choices, which makes me feel uncomfortable. My car's fan is broken which means minimal heat, but at least the weather is mild enough. I could bitch and moan more, but this is enough for now.

best of

Per request I'll share a little anecdote from my youth, let's go all the way back to kidnergarten. Imagine me at 5 years old; chubby, shy, disheveled, my only friends thus far having been farm animals...but, I could draw a really good bird. I may have made a friend or two on the bus, another girl with the same name as me, and Sonya, who I approached and asked to be my friend (she agreed), but alas we were not in the same class. Anyways, as the year went on my social skills didn't exactly improve, I vaguely remember once instance when I played with a boy named Anthony, but beyond that I was alone. At the end of the year our Teacher gave everyone a prize to highlight something that we were good at, and of course she had to give one to everybody. Yes, I got the prize "Best able to play by myself", I was praised for my incredible ability to busy myself despite a lack of friends.

stroke?

I feel like I just had a minor stroke, as in I feel nauseous, have a headache, couldn't see well for a short time, and my right hand and arm went numb. I've since regained eyesight and feeling in my fingers, and I just took some non-aspirin and waiting to see if that helps. I'm thinking I will leave early and go lay down.

On top of that I'm listening to VH1 radio, I love the 90's, and bringing back those memories of adolescence and High School. I was by no means popular, but I don't despise my high school experience. I may have been nerdy, but I wasn't ridiculed, I was too much of a wallflower to be ridiculed, I moreso went unnoticed. I definitely would go to the next reunion, I'm sure many are married with children, I know many didn't leave Owatonna, including most of my good friends from back then, to each their own I guess.

It is really difficult to find long, brown boot laces.

life as we know it

Cassie and I are into the third season of "Six Feet Under", Claire is in art school, so there are some ideas thrown around in the show regarding well, art. Cassie and I enjoy this since we are of course both highly talented artists, well, she's talented, and I like to think that I am too. Anyways, in one episode, Claire is in class and her prof. is babbling about something along the lines of how most artists latch on to a previous or famous artist's ideas or technique and it's because they are embarrassed to show what is really inside them, essentially embarrassed of themselves. That was the jist I got from it anyways. It's a pretty common theme amongst artists, the whole having your own ideas, being original, finding your voice or whatever. I haven't made a painting in at least 2 years. I know that I'm definitely embarrassed by myself and my ideas as I'm sure has been gathered by anyone who reads this blog. I try to think of a theme, and my mind is blank, it all seems so derived. Or, as in the espisode we watched last night...everything has been done already, so it's just putting your own spin on a redundant idea? and what if that feels forced? what if I'm really good at and really like painting children and puppies, but in order to be a real artist I have to be saying something with my work, a child and puppy has to offer some commentary, something thought provoking rather than just a pretty thing to hang on the wall, though plenty of "artists" are in it only to make pretty things (uh, like Kinkade perhaps?) Where I'm going with this, I really have no idea, but I've been thinking about my embarrassment, and if/how I might share it, how that might affect things, I mean personally and all. Just thinking is all.

I'm feeling restless, and tired of my excuses.

dozing

Had computer training today, of course 2/3 of it didn't pertain to me and I couldn't even get online, I just had to sit there and try to stay awake. I played a bit of Ms. Pac Man on my phone.

I just realized that I am wearing brown shoes and a black shirt.

finally again

I woke up bleary eyed this morn at 7:10, and realized that I had been sleeping through my alarm. I dragged myself out of bed, flicked on the early show, cozied up on the sofa and leapt eyes upon my dear friend Sally. It appears as though she will be on the next season of Survivor:Exile Island! I'm sure your thinking "wow, you know 2 people on reality TV, you must be pretty cool" Yes, yes I am pretty cool.

I finally got my New Year's pics on here.

The weather has been extremely mild the past few weeks, and it's sunny out today.

Fuj and I

Fuj and I
Originally uploaded by snielson.

Todd riverdancing

Todd riverdancing
Originally uploaded by snielson.

I had no idea that Todd had moves like this

I'm the winner

I'm the winner
Originally uploaded by snielson.

Look, I won best blog of 2005!! I'd like to thank my mom and dad...my fantabulous friends...and my Lord and Savior, JC

me and Sal

me and Sal
Originally uploaded by snielson.

Reunited with Sal... and it feels so good

I just hope she remembers the little people

Portrait of Fuj and I

Portrait of Fuj and I
Originally uploaded by snielson.

MS flava and Sally

MS flava and Sally
Originally uploaded by snielson.

Flava being his half gay self with a baloon tied to his wrist, and Sally, soon to be featured in next season's Survivor

toast

toast
Originally uploaded by snielson.

A New Years toast

Me and Jenni

Me and Jenni
Originally uploaded by snielson.

Look, my hair fades into the background...looks kinda creepy

Sarah and me with the tree

Christmas photo
Originally uploaded by snielson.

I think this can be our Christmas card for next year

focused

focused
Originally uploaded by snielson.

working on my Pilates technique

In the city streets

In the city streets
Originally uploaded by snielson.

Fujalicious and myself, bashing around the streets of Chicago

brunch

brunch
Originally uploaded by snielson.

NYE brunch, Jenni, Beth, me and Sally

most recent near death experience

My adventure filled weekend proceeded thusly...
Friday night I get home from work, read a bit, then hop in my car to go to Cassie's as we had plans to hit up a couple art openings. I'm driving along on the freeway and my car loses battery power, this poses a problem because there is no shoulder and I didn't make it to the exit ramp. So I'm stalled in a lane of traffic, it's dark, I have my flashers on but cars are coming at me fast, several near accidents, and one actual accident (not serious) occurs, it was a bit unnerving though the police came to my aid pretty quickly. I felt bad being the cause of all that trouble. Anywho, I get my car towed to the shop, Cassie picks me up and we are on our way. We go to meet up with Jenni at her place since the first gallery is in her building, the show is over but we head down to see if there is still anyone milling around, nope, but the door was unlocked so we sneaked around and looked at the art. We chill at Jenni's for a bit before heading to our next destination in Northeast. The next show was still going strong by the time we get there at 11, I was warmly greeted by the gallery owner with a hug, I felt special. Another gallery down the street was open too, so we checked that out, made pals with the owner, his brother and his buddy. We all ponder over to the bar down the street which had been fairly recently bought out and refubished from a total dive (and I'm talking real dive, not a trendy dive like the Dragon), to a pretty hip place. We enjoyed the company of our new artsy friends, marvelled at the change in atmosphere of the bar (we had all gone once while it was in its divish state trying to find a Nikki's replacement), and danced to some Stones (beast of burden, in your honor Olivia).

Yesterday was bridal shower and bachelorette pary extravaganza for my oldest and dearest friend Jenny P., who though she had been in an irritable state with me the previous evening (due to my car issues), was in a better mood when she picked me up. I saw a bunch of folk I haven't seen in years at the shower, and actually won a prize. Jenny and I differ in taste and lifestyle, which is why we aren't as close as we once were, she prefers the subarbs and cheesy country music, I stick to the city and good music. So her idea of fun for the evening was to go to a bar in a southern 'burb, dress up in prom dresses and dance to a cover band. Honestly I thought I wasn't exactly looking forward to it and figured I'd probably end up sitting alone in the corner, chain smoking. I was dog tired, but I got a little dressed up in my old prom dress (not really formal, just a simple black number), tights and my sexy boots. I caught my second wind and actually had a decent time, we brought Peter Pecker, the blow up doll with an erect penis along, so that in and of itself made the evening entertaining and worthwhile. And I was totally productive this morning and did some thorough cleansing of the apartment.

For tomorrow...pics from New Years, I'm too lazy right now to deal with them.

some miscellaneous photos

Animals, a baby, friends, my mother...a slice of my world to share with y'all (and I have nothing of interest to write about), more coming soon!

Public Service Announcement
Originally uploaded by snielson.

A logical and sound warning against public fornication

chillin' at the Pig
Originally uploaded by snielson.

(from L to R) Cassie, Jenni, Alex, Ann, Todd, and myself in my fiestaware sweater enjoying some post church fellowship

Clara and mom
Originally uploaded by snielson.

My mom was not shy to express her opinion on Clara's looks, and how she is a better looking baby than any of her other grandchildren. This led to a dicussion about the cuteness of her own children, how Romaine wasn't too cute, Mark was pretty (he's her favorite), then I asked, "What about me mom?", her reply was something to the effect of "uhhh, yeah sure, you were cute" in a not so convincing tone.

me and George
Originally uploaded by snielson.

Why does he resist my love? Its always gotta be on his terms

Clara
Originally uploaded by snielson.

someone's got their eye on you
Originally uploaded by snielson.

Lucy, pondering how to thwart lecherous Snuffy's unwelcome advances

boozehound George
Originally uploaded by snielson.

Looks like George is about to fall off the wagon yet again, he can't resist the siren song of Leine's Honeyweiss

home
Originally uploaded by snielson.

The 'ol farm, where I grew up

Holly and I in our nasty office
Originally uploaded by snielson.

Holly and myself trying to maintain a positive attitude in our vermin infested office

satisfactory

I must have had a good start to my day because as I was driving to work I thought to myself, "Self, things are pretty satisfactory, you're going places!" Then I chuckled because, well, whether I'm actually "going places" is yet to be determined, nor is it top priority for me to go places. I got to work only 26 minutes late, so though I'm not improving at least I'm not regressing in my lateness. Baby steps.

owie

I slipped and biffed on the porch stairs, got the hard, sharp concrete stair in the back, that one felt good. I could have died, broken my back, or had some other severe injury, I should sue my landlord for having unsafe conditions, the stairs were very icy.

By sunday I'm going to have my room in decent shape and the apartment spotless for Betsy's return. That's my goal anyways.

That's about all the excitement I have right now.

a new year, a new deductible

Possible and popular New Years Resolutions that I could choose to give a go at.

1. Excercise regularly: Unfortunately my health insurance (from a healthcare facility) doesn't participate in the reimbursment program at the gym. When I inquired as to why, the reponse was that it cost too much money. This almost makes me want to get obese and acquire heart disease and diabetes just to show them how much it could cost otherwise. In any case I am pondering joining a real gym, not the thing they call a gym here at the hospital.

2. Quit smoking: A couple friends claim that they are going to quit smoking. Having seen first hand the lack of self control we all have, especially when we all get together and have a few drinks, I won't hold my breath. I myself haven't made this resolution, in fact I'll step outside for a smoke as soon as I'm done writing this, but, it will be the first of the day (8 p.m.ish).

3. Stop being mean to George: I don't severely abuse the cat, but I often tell him to shut up, and I may toss him a few feet, but he's a cat, he lands on his feet. Clearly it is ineffective since he continues to be annoying.

4. Exude creativity: I've got paper, paints, an easel, pencils, charcoal, ink, other miscellaneous odds and ends, I can at least lay down some paint and see what shows up.

5. Organize my space: My room has been in a state of dissarray since I switched rooms, I need to stop putting it off (but I've really been busy, honest).

6. Become self-aware and experience enlightenment: By the year 2007, I plan to know myself completely and be entirely spiritually in tune.

I had a fantastic New Year's in Chicago, wonderful and gracious hosts, plenty of hearty laughter, good music, food, booze, and fellowship. My only complaint was the time spent there was too short. Pictures of debauchery coming soon.

star wars snow

the snow is coming down hard, it's the sticky stuff perfect for making snowmen or whatever your heart desires, a snow girl or boyfriend (just watch out for the "cold" shoulder, hahahahaha). My brother and I sculpted Jabba the Hut as youngsters. Not so good for when you want to drive to Chicago, I have utmost confidence in the Golf though, have a trusty one myself.

That roomate of mine is a darn funny girl.

a bit o vermin never did any harm

Actually, I guess in some instances they have, wasn't the plague spread by rats or something. There was a cockroach in our office kitchen this morning, people are freaking out. I'm frankly surprised that we haven't had more and varied infestations, considering how old, disgusting and ugly our office building is. Company colors are turquoise and purple, imagine the now shabby decor, it isn't very inspiring. Of course the cockroach disgusts me, however I've dealt with living with vermin most of my life, we all just have to coexist.

Having lately been waking later and later, arriving to work between 45 min. to an hour late, I enlisted the help of my co-worker Angela to get me to work on time, I asked her to give me a wake up call. She did so at 6:30 a.m., at which time I had been sleeping soundly through my alarm for about 50 minutes. I still didn't make it to work until 8:25, what the hell is wrong with me?

McDonald's is pissing me off, I've been getting salads to attempt to combat my holiday intake of fat and sugar, and have noticed that Iceberg lettuce has replaced what was once was a variety of leafy greens. Iceberg has no nutritional value nor as much flavor, yet the price remains the same. Of course what should I expect from a corporation such as McDonald's. As a former employee I'm saddened and dissapointed, but I gave them my 2 cents.

I spy cheesecake in the fridge....

I beat the bank

I just narrowly escaped an overdraft or 2, phew, thanks to a little help from my trusty friend Jenny P., who forged my signature and deposited my check for me, I loooove that girl. I also love beating the bank.

Any desireable treats in the office have finally been eaten, so I am no longer gorging myself on fat and sugar, surely adding to my already ample love handles.

I'm tired, the good kind of tired that comes from only getting a couple hours sleep because you were up late getting a good wine buzz, talking to good friends, , Sal and MS flava, (and Jenni and Todd too though they turned in earlier), and being highly entertained by the humping dog. More shenanigans to come this weekend in the Windy City.

moving on?

Well, look at me, I emailed that Americorps lady that I corresponded with last year and just heard back that there may a position opening in the spring, so she's going to keep me posted, and I applied for another program as well, both in Philadelphia. Yikes, I may actually move out of Minnesota.

Though I hope it won't be until after early March, since Cassie and I are going to San Francisco for her spring break.

Possible dinner with Sally Poppins tonight? I need to pinch myself to make sure I'm not dreaming.

the unclean animal

Three meals in a span of 2 1/2 days eating pork, plus the ham that was forced upon me to take home. I prefer the old fashioned processed ham to the wild boar or whatever my dad made. I'm not sure if he hunted that thing down himself, but it tasted weird.

Oh, what a lovely holiday I had, the best part was the time spent sleeping, oh glorious sleep, how I've missed thee. I had a few short hours with Romaine, Phil and the kids before they left for New York, watched my mother gush over the baby, who is of course "the prettiest baby she's ever seen" at least since the last time one of my sister's gave birth. Does anyone else start to feel like kids become sorta generic? Not to sound void of human attachment, I'll try to explain...you are with your family or friends and small children are present in varying ages and stages of development. Though children obviously develop differently and at differing paces, they basically all go through similar stages, each stage having its own endearing cuteness. Everyone observes the children doing cute things, everyone laughs and talks all cutesy, this cycle continues on and on, never seeming to end. I mean, I realize all kids have distinct personalities, but at some point it kinda all blends together, especially when there are a lot of them around, or maybe that's just me, not that I don't appreciate the cuteness and join in on the laughter as well, or enjoy the individuality of the small ones.

Anyways, just some random thoughts. I'd say the best quote of the weekend came from Doug, my mom's on again, off again beau, a struggling alcoholic, and a decent and entertaining man at least when he's sober, who often has random bits of wisdom to share. He does plastering and other construction type work for a living so I asked him if he had any projects outside of adding a sunroom onto my mom's house. His reply was, "nope, just here, and the one in my brain" well said Dougie, well said.

Other highlights included the random goat, the unexpected presence of my brother, stepmother Barb's use of the word "necking", and the gift of a fine french easel, given to me by my pa. I guess I have one less excuse for continuing to be a lame artist.

I also came home pleasantly surprised to find that the cats had behaved themselves while I was gone. In trying to positively reinforce Lucy's good behavior, I made sure to tell her how proud I am of her for being a good kitty.

the look, the feel

I look/feel like crap today, which was confirmed by my manager as I walked in late and disheveled this morning, she gave me the 'ol, "you still look tired". I feel exhausted and am really hoping to just relax at my mom's tonight, though my dad mentioned something about having dinner, which is sure to be lame. However I am getting my hair cut so maybe that will rejuvinate me. The cat has it out for me, of that I am certain (sorry to villify your cat Olivia, but she is being quite naughty).

Santa Baby?

Is anyone else entirely sick of that song?, cause I sure am

feline love/hate

My very own cat will be fat and lazy, I will not get a frisky kitten, or a spry young thing, I will search for a cat that moves only to eat and use the facilities, one that will be affectionate and share its blubber induced warmth with me on a cold winter's night. I have grown fond of George and Lucy, having shared space with them for a few months now. They, however, are energetic and consequently destructive, they have been known to destroy plants within minutes, pee in my laundry basket of clean clothes on more than one occasion, vomit on the floor, claw holes in clothing or other fabric items, chew on shoes or anything chewable, scratch annoyingly on plastic in the middle of the night... Lucy's blank stare is starting to look less innocent, I in fact wonder if she is holding some sort of grudge against me, and I'm finding it difficult to reason with a cat. Will I miss them when our time is through and they leave to live with Olivia's mother?? As that time draws near, I ponder these things in my heart, and my feelings are conflicting and confusing. I know I have at least learned from our relationship, keep things out of reach, get plants with sturdy leaves, etc., and for that I am grateful.

anonymity

I'm actually very virginal and prudish, despite my posts of late...don't want to give anyone the wrong impression of me.

Speaking of impressions...I sometimes forget that this thing (blog) is public and hell, people other than those I tell about it can come across it, since it isn't exactly anonymous, and write about my friends and my city. Anyways, I don't particularly mind someone that I don't know or haven't met or am unlikely to meet from some random part of the country or world reading this, or my friends either, but the thought that some random person in Mpls might come across this is embarrassing. Do you know how small this city is? well, it is. I envision someone reading this, thinking "OMG I know that girl, she's hangs out at such and such and she is beyond weird, I'm going to tell all my friends and we will laugh at her, not with her." So there it is, my insecurity brought out to the light, if any random Mpls/St. Paul dweller reads this, please don't make fun of me, I have a fragile ego, you can think I'm a huge nerd but please keep it to yourself.

I pray to God that I never have to pass a kidney stone.

Fujalicious had to cancel her plan to come tonight, I'm a little sad, but hopefully I'll see her soon over New years. Awww, we were going to stitch and bitch together, darn it.

sick, sick minds

I had a lovely, spacious box to mail christmas gifts to my sister and her family, but Lucy was naughty and peed in it (it appears that I can't leave any open box lying around, it will be degraded by Lucy). Fortunately there is always an abundance of desireable boxes here at work, ripe for the picking. I was perusing the fine selection this morning, my eye on a rather large box, wondering if was too large a parcel for the post however, and thinking out loud, said as much. Co-worker Holly came to my aid and took a peek online to check on package sizes. By the time she's done reading about how you have to measure the "length" and the "girth" in order to determine if it is a small or large "package", or if can even be shipped at all, we are in a fit of giggles. Much like the time when we were waiting for the elevator, my hands were full so I was trying to press the button with my elbow while Holly gets a soda. She comes back while I'm repeatedly trying to hit the button with my elbow (apparently harder than it seems), and asks me, "so you think if you rub it, it will come faster", why yes Holly, indeed I do.

I just decided I'd like to be a poet, I'm going to try my hand at it, soon you'll be seeing me at your local beatnik bistro, sharing my heart with finely crafted wordplay.

load off

My brother is o.k., just heard from my mom. He checked himself into the hospital, which is obviously good and it's good to know he's safe. There's always hope that he'll get the help he needs and it will make a difference, but at the same time it is what it is.

I've decided on going to Chicago for New Years, if nothing else I can hang out with Fuj. in Rockford and spend quality time with Ed and Jean, and of course hit up beef-a-roo.

Heading to the MOA tonight, was hoping it'd be avoidable, but alas, it is not.

knitting vs. crocheting

Still no word on my bro, he's supposed to work tomorrow though and my mother is keeping me posted. So..still a bit concerned but at this point there isn't much to be done, so just waiting for more info.

On a lighter note I'll share a funny (hopefully not only to me) anecdote from the other night. Roomate Betsy has been a loyal patron of a local establishment and enjoys the band that has the regular friday night gig there. I've had an open invintation to accomany her and finally had the chance to go the other night. She and I, bundled up and flask full of Jim Beam in hand, braved the elements for the oh, about 8 block walk. Upon arrival we find out that Truth isn't playing, Betsy is sad. She calls the ex who is a block away, we decide to join him. He and a regular at my local shop (they; Betsy, ex and regular, all went to college together) are chillin', I'm a bit tipsy from an empty stomach and shots of beam, and excited to be hanging out with a fellow regular outside the coffee shop realm. We all chat a bit, ex leaves, and we decide to head home, since regular is going to local shop he offers us a ride, and on the way we see even more regulars at a local bar outside smoking. I suggest we join them, which we do, though only one regular stays (so now its me, Betsy, and 2 regulars, confusing I know). Betsy is sans id, which is lost within the depths of her room apparently, so we leave shortly after arriving, and go to none other than the local shop. OK, this is the funny part, I'm tipsy, I'm excited to be hanging out with 2 regulars outside the local shop, Betsy and I start discussing a post New years party we are planning on having and how it is top priority to have cute boys there. I say, "Yeah, we are totally going to get laid by some hot guys" rather loudly. She agrees, adding that said hot males will read really good books, and of course this is very funny to us. Mind you, when I'm at the local shop I'm basically a loner, sitting in the corner keeping to myself with the occasional chat with a select few regulars, so I'm guessing my little comment came off as a bit shocking, even though I basically just like to use the term (or phrase?) "getting laid" at any opportunity since I like it so much, I mean, of course I wouldn't plan a party solely in the hopes that I might get some (would I?).

I sure hope that was funny.

proscrastinate

That's me, I'm a procrastinate, always have been, always will be I imagine. You know, the kind of person who will take the day off to finish the paper or project that was due that morning or afternoon. I gotta shop tomorrow, fing christmas, depletes me of my time and money buying uneeded things for people that don't need anything really, but I do like to receive nonetheless.

My mother called this afternoon, leaving only a message of "call me back ok" so I knew it was something. I was tipsy off a couple bloody's (still am) and apparently my brother is missing, as in he "borrowed" her truck and hasn't returned it since last night, she was hoping I had heard from him, which I haven't. Right now I'm kinda like, this is nothing unusual, he'll show up eventually, and a slight part of me is concerned. I think my brother and I are a lot alike, except that I managed to somehow stay out of trouble, but could easily see myself being unstable like he is, if I had been apart of the right circumstances. Well, I'm hoping no news is good news.

what the

I was blocked by a bright yellow hummer this morning while trying to cross the parking lot as a pedestrian, something tells me that they were unconcerned about pedestrians. Why why why do people drive around in hummers to go about their everyday lives??, it is so beyond ridiculous.

Like many I'm feeling rather downtrodden regarding the upcoming holiday and need to buy gifts. Reviewal of my budget tells me that I shouldn't attempt to go to Chicago for New Years, but since when did I care about my budget and being responsible. If I get feedback that my presence there is desired (ahem), I will likely pony up, if not then I will be sad and forlorn in Mpls since all my friends seem to be going to Chicago (and will save money). Not that I have issue with ringing in the new year alone, I am my own party.

way to go

Fwd:
Originally uploaded by snielson.

There's the Jayhawks (taken on my shitty phone camera) at first ave. (aren't they hot?) for their 35th anniversary celebration. Overall the night was great, although there was something like 8 bands in the main room and so they only each played maybe four songs. They also played some incredibly hot footage of Prince between bands. I was supposed to go with my ol' buddy Dan, but apparently he was arrested and shackled the previous evening for driving without a license and his car was impounded. I'm truly sorry for his misfortune, but when he was telling me about his night in the slammer I couldn't help but laugh. So Betsy and her friend met up with me later, I was already two giant Corona's toward drunk and had just been offered a third by some guy who said I was awesome and called me a monkey (apparently a compliment), which I don't think pleased his girlfriend much. Way to go first ave. you are dirty and you have a distinct odor (wouldn't have it any other way), but you can sure put on a good show, happy anniversary.

my mistake

The ban remains in effect for Mpls, its been scaled back for other cities in Henn. county, I heard the news on my clock radio so I was a bit groggy. Well, that's a bummer, it'd be nice if say First ave. still could allow smoking.

to look or not to look

Since I missed the Amazing Race last night for a free ticket to see A Christmas Carol at the Guthrie...do I see who won now? or should I wait until I have a chance to watch it, which may not be for a few days?? The suspense...is making me uncomfortable.

The play was rather enjoyable, it was "girls night out" for some of the church employees (my part time job), since I don't actually go to that church I don't know most of the people there. It was nice to spend some time with Jenny P., it's fun that we can still hang out and get all giggly like in the olden days. We went out to eat and I chuckled quietly to myself while overhearing a plot being formed by two of the women to evangelize the parents of her son's playmate, and just the basic concern of "are they Christian?" to which was the reply "I think they claim to be" implying that they don't REALLY live the "Christian" lifestyle, but of course they are still very nice people. Ha, if they had any knowledge of mine or Jenny's lifestyle (hers was waay more sordid than mine, but she recently has settled down), well, it'd be interesting to see their reaction. I wish I had the balls to slip in some inappropriate banter into smalltalk for entertainment purposes whilst sober and with church folk, but my inappropriateness usually only happens when I'm drunk. In any case, there's nothing like some Dickens, carol's, and a hilarious fake dog (I NEED one!) to spark an inkling of Christmas spirit, which quickly fizzled. However, as it is meant to do, it did make me feel as though I lack enough regard for the poor. It also put me in the mood to watch Little Women.

I've received advice from a couple people to try to seduce my crush, consequently "stealing" him from his new gal...and I see a few problems with this as follows:
1. I don't think I have the confidence or knowhow to attempt such an endeavor, resulting likely in humiliation without the desired result.
2. Though I'm fairly certain they have only been dating a month or two, I would feel bad chasing after someone's boyfriend, and
3. If he was interested in me in "that way" I think I'd know it by now.
It isn't like I'm devastated or anything. It's often just fun and distracting to have a crush (overanalyzing any look or conversation, getting all nervous and blushy, a reason to not look like a slob). I mean, I barely know the guy, though of course we could be deliriously happy if given the chance. Really though, I'm happy that he's getting some action, and I wish them the best (until he realizes she's lame and dumps her for me). Perhaps I'm sickly addicted to rejection, I mean, there's plenty of old men who want to get in my pants, but yet I pine for those who are unavailable or uninterested.

They are doing a trial period of scaling back the smoking ban in Mpls., interesting....

unrequited

I get home from work yesterday, and am pleased to see that Betsy has an attractive young man over, both are already drunk off Jim Beam and time spent at the Dragon. Betsy has been heartbroken as of last week. She had been hoping that things were rekindled with her ex, but he recently informed her otherwise, so I'm happy that she and her hot co-worker (who shares her love for 60's/70's soul and r&b) are hanging out outside of work. They take off and I make myself dinner, watch a little Felicity, then head over to the local shop to read. My crush is working and the place is packed, the only available seat is at the front counter, and I am pleased to take my seat, hoping for the opportunity to chat with my love interest. Instead I bury my nose in Harry Potter and keep to myself, listening in on his conversation with his buddy and adding a couple sarcastic comments when appropriate. The conversation turns toward christmas gifts and how the buddy hadn't gotten anything for his girlfriend yet, and then the dreaded words..."what did you get for (girlfriend's name here)?" Tickets to the ballet, how cliche huh? Said girlfriend shows up within the half hour and I'm subjected to pecks on the cheek and back rubbing within 3 feet of my presence. Thoughts of "this is totally lame" and "I'm way more attractive than she is" roll around in my head and I move to a recently emptied seat in the other room and attempt to get lost in the realm of Hogwarts, but to no avail. Well, it's getting late and there is still a couple episodes of Felicity waiting to be watched and cookie dough to be eaten in my depressed state so I head home. As I'm leaving I get asked out by yet another unattractive old guy who keeps talking about how I make him "melt" while I'm trying to make it clear that I just want to get home. Now I'm thinking about avoiding the local shop since I A. no longer have a chance with the object of my affection, and B. keep getting hit on by old men. Betsy comes home shortly after, still drunk, and makes me laugh hysterically by sharing excerpts of her scathing letter to the ex, and how hot, fun and manly her new crush is. She lends an understanding ear to my tale of unrequited love, I support her villification of her ex (with whom she is still obviously in love), we watch an old man cry on antiques roadshow and finally retire to our respective quarters.

Time for angsty chick music.

support what?

I just got an email asking to support the smoking ban from a co-worker, apparently they are considering "scaling back" the ban in Henn. cty. At first I thought, alright, maybe they will allow smoking in bars again, but after putting my coat on after an evening in smoky Costello's in St. Paul, it is pretty disgusting to smell of stale smoke. I actually like the ban, but I won't be opposed to letting bars that have more sales in liquor allow smoking, like in St. Paul.

It's balmy out today.

I think I'm going to join a choir that one of the nurses belongs to at some church, she seems pretty excited by the idea of me joining anyways. It's just an informal thing, so I think it would be fun, and maybe there will be hot choir boys in it. Nothing turns me on more than a guy with a lovely voice who likes to sing sacred music.

I have a lot going on this week, I'll be missing the amazing race finale (I know, I know) tomorrow to go to the Guthrie and ses A Christmas Carol, wed. night going to First Ave., thur. is book club, which I still have to read the book, good grief. I'd like to go to the Turf Club tomorrow night after the play too, hmmm, it's not like I really need a good nights sleep to function, right?

been thinking (yeah, I shocked myself too)

I imagine (or hope?) everyone looks at themselves, as I do sometimes (daily), and thinks, yeah, I'm just a bit f-ed up in the head, so yeah, just been thinking lately.

A valient effort in defending Jackson Browne, MS Flava, but I'm not buying it, best sophomore album my ass, and now, thanks to you, I have Dr. My Eyes in my head. Frampton, I'm actually pretty indifferent toward, but Browne, there's just something about that faux sensitivity that gets to me.

Happy birthday Sally Poppins, miss that dinosaur impression of yours.

and a bit more

I'm bored out of my gizzard today.

I'd like to know if anyone would admit to being an actual fan of Peter Frampton, other than my mother. Anyone? MS Flava, I bet you are, I mean, you like Jackson Browne.

and

I finally got my secret santa gift...some bath stuff.

Matt is booked for like 2 weeks, sigh, 2 whole weeks before I get to admire his dark handsomeness while he cuts my hair.

appearances

I was told today I look like fiestaware, I'm not sure how to take that.

I need a haircut.

cold as balls: the apartment chronicles

The hike in gas prices has prompted the 'ol landlord to keep our apartment at what feels like a balmy 50 degrees or so, I don't know how cold it really is, but it feels darn cold. In addition he's making us pay extra to help with the cost, the whole thing stinks, and causes goose pimples. My father was always a stickler about heat too, he was a hardy farm boy though, he and his brothers probably all snuggled in the same bed with one quilt to share or curled up on the dirt floor by the wood stove, so any requests I made for warmth received little sympathy. So though I'm no stranger to wearing a coat in my home, I had enjoyed as an adult to be able to turn up the heat if I so choose, but I have no control in our current situation.

America's favorite Amazing Race family (the Bransen's of course), have made it to the final three!! I think we should have a set time of prayer for them, tomorrow at 6:30 p.m. work for everyone?

solved mysteries and unmentionables to be mentioned

A helpful commenter has confirmed that humans unfortunately do not have gizzards. But, is there any sort of gizzard-like organ that has since gone into unuse (like the appendix from what I understand) or maybe serves a relatively similar function? Just a sampling of the thought-provoking questions that has come about, I can practically hear the synapses popping in my head.

There is also some intrigue in regards to my choice in longjohns. I will oblige those inquiring minds with detailed descriptions of my three pair...one is off-white, one heather gray, and one pale pink (today's choice), no butt flaps, and the gray and off-white ones are not necessarily designed for women if you know what I mean.

cold as balls...winter '05-'06

Getting to be that time of year again, I can say without a doubt its been cold as balls, broke out my longjohns this morning.

After Jenni and I had a hearty laugh over her gizzard comment, we pondered if human's have gizzards, I promised to google within a fortnight. A quick search for "do humans have gizzards", and humans+gizzards did not lend me much information about the subject except for scientific journals that were over my head, so it still remains a mystery.

"thank you for persevering"

That's what one of the nurses said to me last night at our office Christmas party. I wasn't really sure what she meant by that, persevering where? at work? my job isn't all that strenuous so that's no big deal, at the party? I guess I did get a bit lost on the way, but I quickly got on the correct route again, once again, not a big deal. In any case it was kind of her to say. I was actually being half hugged left and right and apparently my presence was appreciated since I was told as much more than once. Maybe I appear love deprived, so they were trying to make it up to me, who knows? The big boss's daughter (who works with us too) and I were like giggly schoolgirls, sharing dirty jokes and poking harmless fun at certain individuals. She's 20, so I threw in the "in my generation", into our conversation which I was quite pleased with. AND, I actually won something for once, a $25 gift certificate to the grocery store, I was so excited, I raised a fist in triumph. My experimental cake didn't turn out as great as I hoped, but it did look rather festive, I think I made myself sick prior by eating too much cake batter and cream cheese frosting.

I feel rejuvenated today, I slept until like 10:30 and had a pretty relaxing sunday, but soon I must depart to sing with the instant choir at church, where I feel inadequate with all those other vocally trained singers. My crush is looking rather handsome today, hmmmm.

hehe

Jenni said "bored out of his gizzard" the other night, now that's funny.

neighborhood Walgreens

neighborhood Walgreens
Originally uploaded by snielson.

Here's my neighborhood Walgreen's, I forgot I had one more pic left on my camera when I was dropping it off.

Me, Clara, Teddy, and Mark (a.k.a. Marcus)

Me, Clara, Teddy, and Mark
Originally uploaded by snielson.

Boy, do I look hot, especially with my greasy hair that was on it's fourth day of unwash, actually it also is wet since I had just gotten out of the shower. There's my brother who finally emerged, this is right before we hit the road to come back to MN.

Climbing

Climbing
Originally uploaded by snielson.

Ben, Teddy and Jade climbing. Teddy had no fear and went higher than Ben, I probably wouldn't have gotten much higher than Jade.

Romaine and Clara

Romaine and Clara
Originally uploaded by snielson.

I had to sneak this pic of Romaine since she hates having her picture taken...but that is her and baby Clara, Noelle's back and Tom

Noelle and Elle

Noelle and Elle
Originally uploaded by snielson.

sister Noelle and niece Elle

Tom, Jade, Teddy, and Phil throwing rocks

Tom, Jade, Teddy, and Phil throwing rocks
Originally uploaded by snielson.

My brother's-in-law with Jade and The Tedmeister

Jade and Cat

Jade and Cat
Originally uploaded by snielson.

Jade and one of the many cats

view from Romaine and Phil's

view from Romaine and Phil's
Originally uploaded by snielson.

they have a cute house, minus the cat smell, and with the surrounding mountains it is quite lovely.

Elle, Ben, Clara, and Jade

Elle, Ben, Clara, and Jade
Originally uploaded by snielson.

The nieces and nephews, minus Teddy, who was acting like a hellion at the moment.

bounty

I arrived to work pleased to find a cornucopia of parking available relatively close to my building. In order to avoid paying something like 10 cents/hr parking in the ramp I opt for street parking.

I just opened something called a "savings" account, apparently you leave money in it for emergency's or large purchases or to accrue interest, it's somewhat of a foreign concept to me and I'm still trying to wrap my head around it. Actually I opened it to pretend I might have a little chunk of money in it mostly for overdraft protection, but I'll surprise myself if I keep a balance of more than $1 in it.